Detangling Nightmares

So I think I may be enjoying my protective bun a little too much. My next wash day is Wednesday and I can already feel the storm coming. The thing is, I haven't washed my hair in almost two weeks. I've just been really lazy with my hair, and I'm not sure why. I'll just blame it on the weather. It's so easy just to tie a scarf around that bun and go to sleep. Since I am pretty sure that this hair is not going down without a fight, any suggestions you all have for me would be great. I need a super slippery conditioner. What are your favorite detanglers?